Life is Full of Questions
by Slumbering Wolf
Summary: A teenage coming of age romance featuring Ash and Kristofferson. Follow them as they try to hide their true feelings from each other and everyone else, while dealing with the problems that plague teenagers everywhere. *Contains spoilers*
1. My Life May Suck

_"Ash, let's get crackin'"_

Felicity Fox's voice roused young Ash, though in truth he hadn't been fully asleep. As on most mornings, he'd been laying in bed trying to savor the only serene moments he'd have the entire day until he lay back down for sleep that night. From morning to night, he was constantly reminded every day how much people hated him for being different, and they never missed an opportunity to make his life hell as a result.

Ash knew better than to make his mother wait. She would not allow him to stay in bed a moment longer than she deemed necessary. It appeared that even his mother was determined to make his life miserable. Ash pulled back the covers, got out of bed and left his room without bothering to get dressed. Maybe he could try to feign illness.

"I'm sick," said Ash the moment he walked into the kitchen.

"You're not sick," Mrs. Fox responded.

"I have a temperature."

"You don't have a temperature."

"I don't want to go."

"Hurry up, you're going to be late."

His mother had said that last bit with such a finality that Ash knew better than to push it. He knew better than to fight with her, he would not win. He felt his ear twitch as it so often did when he was agitated. Ash spared a quick glance at his father, who as usual had his face embedded in the Gazette. Probably reading his stupid column, thought Ash bitterly. Typical, Mr. Fox would never put his son above his work; in fact he doubted his father had even noticed he'd been in the room. What if he'd really been sick, wondered the small fox as he retreated back to his bedroom. Would his father even care if he got some horrible illness? What if he died? Would Mr. Fox really care that much? Would he cry? Or would he be relieved his 'different' son was finally gone and he no longer had to be ashamed of him?

"Oh, and Ash," Called Felicity down the hall as the young fox was putting on his pants. "Your cousin Kristofferson is coming on the 6th."

Both of Ash's ears twitched violently. Kristofferson? That unbearable egomaniac?!

Ash stomped down the hall. "Where's he gonna sleep," confronted Ash. Considering how the day was going, Ash could guess the answer before his mother opened her mouth.

"We're going to make a bed for him in your room," answered Felicity. She seemed unfazed by her son's discontent.

"I can't spare the space, put him in Dad's study."

"Dad's study is occupied by Dad," said Mr. Fox with the first words he spoke to his son that morning. So nice of you to join us, thought Ash with a scathing glare aimed at his father's back as Mr. Fox cut out the column from the Gazette. Still with the damn column, thought Ash. Having run out of patience and now just wanting to get the hell out of the burrow, Ash stormed back out of the kitchen.

"I want you to be extra nice to Kristofferson," Mrs. Fox called after him. "He's going through a very hard time right now, his father is very sick."

Ash didn't care. Kristofferson had everything. Good looks, good grades, he was always popular everywhere he went. From the time when they were just small cubs, Kristofferson had always naturally excelled at everything. Of all the people who went out of their way to make Ash look bad and feel different and inferior, his cousin was the worst. And of course his father was head over heels in love with kid. Just as Mr. Fox never missed an opportunity to criticize his son, he never missed a single chance to lavish praise upon his nephew.

If that asshole thinks he's going to have it better here, he's got another thing coming, thought Ash as he tied his cape around his neck and tucked his pant legs inside his socks. My life my suck compared to his, but while he's here with me he'll know what it feels like to suffer like I do, thought Ash.

"Okay, I'm off," said Mr. Fox from the kitchen as Ash started brushing his teeth. Against his better judgment, Ash came down the hall to see his father off.

"What are you _wearing_," asked Mr. Fox the moment he saw his son. "Why the cape with the pants tucked into your socks?"

Ash's ear twitched in anger, and he spit toothpaste onto the kitchen floor. He stalked off to the bathroom. It figures, he thought. I go in there to see my father off, to show a little appreciation and love for him, and he scolds me and tries to make me feel bad. So typical. Ash kept this train of thought as he prepared to leave. He didn't even say goodbye to his mother as he left, slamming the door behind him. He heard Felicity call after him, and while her voice sounded worried rather than angry, he knew better. She'd just get on his case for spitting on the floor and slamming the door. To hell with that, he thought as he walked to school. I've got no time for her bullshit too.

But another worry churned around in his gut as he neared the school, for another source of antagonism awaited him inside its walls…..

**~Author's comments~**

**Thanks for reading. As you can see, this chapter is fairly short and I don't have a good reason for that, other than it felt longer as I was writing it. What I plan on doing for this story is to depict a scene from the movie in one chapter, and following it up with at least one or two chapters for original original scenes and dialogue before depicting another movie scene. That is the ambition, anyway. Again, many thanks for reading and I hope you have enjoyed my first fanfiction work. This is a new thing for me, so I hope this is as good as I want it to be.  
**


	2. Home For Now

Kristofferson zipped up his suitcase and let out a long sigh. He walked over to his window and looked outside. Birds flitted to and fro in the tree just outside his room, and Kristofferson envied their carefree joy at being alive. In the next room, his father was very ill, maybe even dying. For the first time in his twelve fox years, he was truly afraid. His father had taught him so much; how to meditate, martial arts, how to sing and play guitar. Kristofferson and his dad did everything together. And now he may lose his father forever.

"Are you packed and ready to go?"

Kristofferson turned around. His mother was standing in the doorway, with her arms crossed and looking at him expectantly.

"Yes, mother, I'm ready," answered Kristofferson. He looked at the floor. He could not bear to look at his mother. Though she tried to hide it, her eyes were always full of worry. Seeing such concern on her face, and watching her try unsuccessfully to hide it, was more than Kristofferson could endure. Such concern made it obvious just how precarious his father's health was right now.

"Good, your aunt and uncle are waiting," said his mother.

Resigned to the inevitable, Kristofferson grabbed his suitcase and walked past his mother, who stepped back out of the doorway to give him passage. Kristofferson wanted to see his father before he left, but his mother shook her head when Kristofferson looked at the closed door leading to his parents' bedroom where his father lay. That simple motion told him all he needed to know; his father was sleeping and should not be disturbed. Kristofferson agreed. His father needed all the rest he could get.

As he approached the front door, his mother came up to him and they hugged. Kristofferson felt tears well up in his eyes but did his best to repress them. Though she failed at hiding her concern, his mother still made an effort to be strong and Kristofferson tried to follow her example by not allowing the tears to flood forth.

"Is dad going to die," asked Kristofferson. He was appalled with himself. That question had come forth unbidden, and his mother did not deserve such an inquiry. But she seemed unperturbed by it.

"Your father is very strong Kris. He's led a healthy life, he's stronger than most foxes his age," she said.

"But he still might die. That's why you're sending me away, isn't it?"

"You're going to stay with your uncle and aunt because you've already missed the first three days of the school year. You have to focus on your studies, being here is too much of a distraction for you. When I was your age my grades suffered when my mom, your grandmother, got sick and I stayed at home. Your father and I don't want the same to happen to you. It's not good for a young fox to be stuck at home with someone who is very ill."

"But—"

"No Kris, please. Foxie and Felicity are expecting you. Don't keep them waiting."

"I love you mom," said Kristofferson, letting the issue drop. "Tell dad I love him too when he wakes up."

"I'll do that," she replied, pecking Kristofferson on the cheek. "We both love you too, Kristofferson. You are the best son we could have ever had. You make us both so proud."

Kristofferson knew the truth. Though his parents loved him, he was in the way there. His mother needed to focus all of her attention on tending to his father. There was no room for him there right now. And they did not want him there in case his father really did die. Double pneumonia was a serious illness, and no matter how hard his mother tried to shield him from the awful truth, Kristofferson knew there was a good chance he may never see his father again. He was near the end of the walkway when his mother called out to him. "We'll call you when he's better, Kris. In the meantime, don't worry about him. And try to get along with Ash," she said.

"I will mom," replied Kristofferson. "Bye."

The walk to the river crossing was uneventful. When he got to the crossing, he'd just missed the ferry and had to wait an entire hour for it to return. He didn't mind. He bought his ticket and sat down on one of the tree stumps that served as seats in the waiting area. As he waited, Kristofferson thought about what it was going to be like living with his relatives.

Although he dearly loved his aunt and uncle, he was always embarrassed by the excessive amount of praise uncle Foxie bestowed upon him. Whether it was board games, cards, running…it didn't matter what he did his uncle praised him. Even just standing around quietly uncle Foxie would complement him on how tall he was, or how thick and full his tail was getting. Kristofferson, who was modest by nature, was always uncomfortable with this. It made him even more uncomfortable because he would see his cousin, Ash, scowl when Foxie delivered such praise to Kristofferson. When Kris was around, Foxie ignored his son almost completely. No matter how hard Ash would try to get his attention, Foxie refused to acknowledge him except to cut him down. Kristofferson felt sorry for Ash. It was completely unfair to his smaller cousin.

Kristofferson couldn't help but smile when he thought of his cousin. There were times when Ash could be so cute. Even though he was younger, Kristofferson was nearly twice as big and he couldn't think of any other word than 'cute' to describe his cousin. Though Ash was often sullen and moody, there were times when the armor would falter for just a moment and the kind nature of the young fox would shine through. One time Kris had been visiting and he and Ash had broken Kris' favorite toy, a nutcracker given to him by his father. Upon returning home, Kris unpacked and discovered that Ash had secretly put his own nutcracker down in Kris' suitcase.

That was typical Ash. He never liked to do anything kind when people could see it. He always had to put on the facade of being the 'tough guy'. Kris let him play that role. Ash was very small and...different..., playing the tough guy made him feel more secure and Kristofferson didn't want to take that away from the little fox. Kristofferson knew Ash was probably bullied in school, and maybe by acting tough he was able to keep the bullying at bay a bit. It was a shame, thought Kristofferson, that Ash had to be that way, because he knew that deep inside the tiny fox was a warm and loving person. Kristofferson hoped that Ash didn't get engrossed in playing the 'tough guy' that he one day lost that warmth.

A foghorn announced the arrival of the ferry, and Kristofferson stepped aboard. There were only a few other animals on the boat. A beaver in a business suit and holding a briefcase; he was obviously heading home after work. A young raccoon couple were holding paws and gazing dreamily out over the river as they passed. There were others, but Kristofferson barely noticed and kept to himself. Everyone else on board seemed happy and content, whereas he felt apprehensive and was full of worry. He was worried about his father, of course. He was worried about starting school in a new place, leaving all of his old friends behind on the other side of the river.

Most of all though, he was worried about how he was going to fit in at his aunt and uncles house. Felicity was fine, she was easy going and would accept him with open arms. The problem would be Foxie and Ash. Though it had been almost two fox years since Kris had seen his relatives, he knew Foxie would not have changed and he doubted Ash would be much easier to get along with. Kristofferson was worried he'd cause a greater rift between Ash and his father than there already was. Ash was already largely ignored by his father, who was obviously disappointed that his son was not born naturally athletic like he was. The few times in a day Ash was acknowledged by his father was when he'd done something wrong or was otherwise being criticized. What's worse, Foxie did not seem to notice how he treated his son. Add Kristofferson into the mix, and Ash would be even more shunned by his father, and would be forced to watch and listen as uncle Foxie lavished praise upon his younger cousin. Kristofferson always felt guilty when this happened. He did not wish to be the cause of further dissent between a son and his father.

Kristofferson could not think of a way to avoid this without being rude. His aunt and uncle were inviting him into their home during a very difficult time for Kristofferson and his family. He could not seem ungrateful. Indeed, he was _very_ grateful for the kindness he was being shown. He just wished he could find a way to mend things between Ash and his father, or at the very least stop uncle Foxie from praising him in front of Ash.

The best he could do, thought Kristofferson as he disembarked from the ferry, was to play it by ear and try to avoid situations where Ash would be compared to him. He could let Ash win when they played games. Although he normally did not like to do something like that, as it went against the spirit of honest competition and sportsmanship, Kristofferson had realized through his father's Zen teachings that sometimes sacrifices must be made to keep the peace. "Peace above all things," was a mantra by which Kristofferson lived.

Kristofferson felt a tingle in his gut as he approached his relatives new tree house. It certainly was beautiful, he had to admit. Kristofferson thought it was a bit odd for a fox family to live above ground, but no one could ever claim that his uncle was conventional. Besides, the view was spectacular. Double checking the note in his pocket to make sure this was indeed the right address (it was) Kristofferson took a deep breath to steady himself and rang the doorbell.

For better or worse, he was home for now.

**~Author's note~**

**Thanks again for taking the time to read my work. This is my first original scene for this story, I hope you enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing it. This one was a bit longer than the last one, it took me nearly an hour to write and edit. It was fun to write, to say the least. The next chapter will be another original scene, followed by a scene from the movie. Hopefully will be up by the end of the week.  
**

**=^.^=**

**PS: Please post a comment and let me know what you think so far! :)**


	3. The Train Set

Meanwhile, as Kristofferson prepared to come live with his relatives on the other side of the river, Ash was having a typically bad day at school.

Agnes still barely acknowledged his existence, he was benched yet again during whackbat, and Beaver had slammed him into a locker on his way to chemistry class.

This is why he dreaded school. This is why he had tried to convince his mother he was sick. His life was hell here, and it never got any better. He'd tried telling his father what was going on but Foxie had just said that he had to fight his own battles and that any interference from his parents would only make the situation worse in the long run. Yeah, right. Ash knew better than that. He knew his father simply didn't care enough to do anything to help his son. Easy for him to say to fight his own battles, his father had been a record setting athlete and wildly popular. He hadn't been bullied, hell he probably did his _share _of bullying, and even if he had he'd have been strong enough to do something about it. He had no idea what Ash was going through, and didn't care enough to find out.

Well, that suited Ash just fine. Ash would be a famous athlete too one day. He had the same raw natural talent as his father, he just hadn't honed it yet. So what if he was a late bloomer? Soon everything would click and then everyone would be sorry they doubted him.

Ash was so deep in his thoughts he didn't notice anyone walking up behind him.

"Hey, will you be my lab partner tomorrow," asked a female voice.

Ash looked around and found Agnes, who was looking at him expectantly. "Huh, wha—" Ash blubbered, caught off guard.

"Lab partners, silly," said Agnes again, with a slight giggle in her voice.

"I, uh-, sure," replied Ash. "If you think you can keep up."

Agnes giggled again. "Of course I can," she said. "So, tomorrow then?"

"Sure thing," said Ash.

Why is she so interested in me suddenly, wondered Ash. Is this some sort of set up? Did Beaver put her up to this? No, Ash was pretty sure Agnes despised Beaver. Whatever. Tomorrow will bring what it brings. Couldn't be worse than any other day. Ash wasn't even sure he liked Agnes. Sure, she was pretty and kind, but Ash just wasn't interested in her like most other boys were. Strangely though, Ash was looking forward to tomorrow. It wasn't like him to look forward to anything, except maybe when a new White Cape comic book was about to come out.

I wonder what will make it suck, he thought as he headed toward history class.

**=^.^=  
**

"Kristofferson!"

Felicity greeted the young fox with an enthusiastic hug. "Nice to see you Aunt Felicity," said Kristofferson. "Thank you for letting me stay here."

"It's no problem Kristofferson," said Mr. Fox, coming over to shake Kristofferson's paw. "We're glad to have you, kiddo."

"Come this way," said Felicity. "We're going to put you in Ash's room."

"Are you sure he's going to like that," asked Kristofferson apprehensively.

"Ash is glad to have you," said Felicity. "Same as us."

"Well, I just don't want to intrude on anyone," said Kristofferson.

"Nonsense," replied Mr. Fox, putting an arm around Kristofferson's shoulders. "You're welcome here as long as you want to stay with us."

Of course, Kristofferson was too polite to say he didn't really want to stay with his relatives, that he'd rather be back home helping his mom tend to his father, be he supposed it could be worse. Mr. Fox and Felicity were exceedingly nice, generous foxes and Kris knew he was lucky to have them. He just wished his parents hadn't sent him away. Kristofferson felt he should be with his father; there was nowhere he'd rather be than by his side during this trying time. Kristofferson was no longer a cub; he was almost a full grown fox. Surely he could be counted on to face adversity and he shouldn't be sheltered from serious situations. After all, his father's health was more important than a few school subjects. Kristofferson had learned far more important things from his dad, such as meditation and self-defense. That was more important than math or history.

"Here, let's move this train set over in the corner and you can sleep here," said Felicity.

"Maybe I can sleep in the corner," suggested Kristofferson. "That way you won't have to move the train set."

"No nephew of mine is going to sleep in a corner like dirty laundry," said Mr. Fox. "Kristofferson, you wanna grab that end of the train set?"

"Oh, um, sure," said Kristofferson. He and Uncle Fox carried the model train over to the corner of Ash's room.

"There's no plug in over here," said Mr. Fox. "Oh well, it's not like Ash needs this every day. I'll pick up an extension cord next time I'm at the hardware store."

"Well, if you think that's ok," said Kristofferson as he admired the train set. It was a beautiful piece of work. Most of it looked like an expensive set Kristofferson had once seen in a toy store, but other parts of it looked like they'd been made by hand, probably the work of Mr. Fox and Felicity. Whatever the case, it was certainly impressive. Kristofferson felt a pang of regret that they wouldn't be able to plug it in; he'd loved to have seen it lit up and in motion.

"Alright," said Felicity. "Now I know you're hungry. It's a long journey from your house across the river. Let me make you something to eat."

"Now you're talking," said Mr. Fox.

"I don't think so Foxie," admonished Felicity. "You just had lunch before Kristofferson got here. Look at him, a growing boy has got to eat!"

"Well, if you say so," grumbled Mr. Fox, giving his nephew a good natured punch on the shoulder. "Though if the boy grows much more he won't be able to fit in the house, right Kristofferson?"

"If you say so," replied Kristofferson. It was already happening, thought the young fox. They're already making over me and pushing Ash aside, and he's not even here. We shouldn't have moved the train set. I don't want Ash to feel like I'm intruding on him, and already I am and he's not yet home from school. This is going to be a long day, thought Kristofferson as he sat down at the kitchen table and, making sure no one was looking, he buried his head in his hands.

** =^.^=**

"You moved my train set?!"

"Yes, we did," said Felicity, her tone allowing no room for argument. "Kristofferson is not going to sleep off in the corner, and your father already said he's going to pick up an extension cord from the hardware store."

"Well, he'd better soon," said Ash, ear twitching.

Ash was furious. Already his cousin was dictating his life, and he hadn't even been here a full day! Well, this would not stand, he thought. When he had Kristofferson alone in his room he'd make the silver fox move the set right back where it was. If he didn't like it he could just sleep under it. Who the hell did he think he was, thought Ash. Coming here, playing up the sick father routine, and just acting like he runs the place?

"Why don't you boys fill up the swimming pool and try diving from that branch up there" suggested Mrs. Fox, pointing at a tree branch that was not too high from the ground. "Now that we live in a tree we can use the limbs as diving boards."

"That might be fun," said Kristofferson.

"You boys start climbing, I'll get the hose," said Mr. Fox.

"Yeah, whatever, I'm jumping first," said Ash, pushing himself in front of Kristofferson as the younger fox headed toward the tree. When both were on a branch just above the pool, Ash made sure his parents were watching. He took a deep breath.

"Ok, ready when you are," called out Mr. Fox as he withdrew the hose from the now full swimming pool.

"Watch this dad!" he called out as he jumped.

It was not a good dive, and Ash knew it. On the way down he flailed his arms trying to stay upright, and then made a huge splash as he hit the water.

"Well, well, good jump Ash," said Mr. Fox halfheartedly. "Remember to keep your tail tucked," he added.

My tail tucked, thought Ash. Sure, whatever. As if that was the problem. He's just patronizing me. Making me look like a fool in front of Kristofferson.

Ash turned just in time to see Kristofferson leap from the branch. His form was perfect, and he hit the water with barely a splash.

"Whoo! Yeah, what a jump," cheered Mr. Fox, who stood and clapped. "This kid's a natural! I'm speechless, Kristofferson."

Ash, who was drying off with a towel, could only grumble to himself his disgust. Nothing changes, he thought. Of course my father liked Kristofferson's dive better, and of course Kristofferson's was perfect. As always, trying to show me up. Can't that ass do something else with his time? Does he have to always go out of his way to make me look bad? Why does he hate me so much?

"Do you think I'm an athlete," asked Ash, coming over to his father.

"What are you talking about," asked Mr. Fox.

"Well, I think I'm an athlete," said Ash. "And sometimes, I don't think you see me that way."

"What's the subtext here," asked Mr. Fox. "Is he…praying," asked Mr. Fox, looking at Kristofferson, who was sitting on the ground and humming to himself.

"I think it's...yoga," said Mrs. Fox.

It figures! I'm trying to have a talk with my father, thought Ash, and he can't even keep his eyes off Kristofferson long enough to listen to me. This sucks!

"How long is Kristofferson going to be staying with us," asked Ash.

"Until your uncle gets better," whispered Felicity.

"Well, yeah, but how long do we plan to give him on that," asked Ash. "I mean, it's not like double pneumonia is that serious, ri—"

"Lower your voice, Ash," admonished Felicity.

Yeah, whatever, thought Ash. He stormed back into the house, ears twitching. He looked back over his shoulder at Kristofferson, who was still sitting on the ground with his legs in a pretzel. Meditation? He's such a weirdo, thought Ash, slamming the door behind him.

** =^.^=  
**

Later that night, after dinner, the two young foxes were alone in Ash's room. This was the first time they had been alone together in about four fox years.

"Help me move my train set back," said Ash.

"But your parents don't want me sleeping in the corner," replied Kristofferson.

"Then sleep under it," snapped Ash. "I really don't care. But that train set goes back where it was. My father isn't going to get a cord any time soon. I know him."

"Well, ok," said Kristofferson. "I just don't want to get you in trouble."

"My parents hate me," said Ash. "If they don't bitch at me over this, they'll find something else. Now help me, will you?"

The two foxes moved the train set back to where it had been before Mr. Fox and Kristofferson had moved it earlier. Ash plugged it in and turned it on. It was even better than Kristofferson had anticipated. The lights dazzled him, it looked like a real town lit up at night as the train made its circular path around the table.

"Wow," whispered Kristofferson.

"Nice, isn't it," said Ash. "My father bought it for me a couple of fox years ago. He's been adding to it ever since. See the trees? He made most of those, they didn't come with the set. The railroad crossing is his too. Mom helped paint all of it."

"It's beautiful," said Kristofferson. "Surely your mom and dad can't hate you if they put all this work into something for you."

"What do you know," snapped Ash. "I don't want to talk about it. If you don't believe me, just watch the way they treat me. They always have to cut me down for something."

Kristofferson wanted to tell Ash that that was how parents are; that moms and dads point out things cubs do wrong so that they can teach them the right way. But Kristofferson knew better than to push the issue. Ash was already in a foul mood, and it had been a long day for them all. They sat in silence, watching the small train make its rounds through the little town and back up the mountain that someone, probably Mr. Fox, had painstakingly crafted.

"Ash," he said after a while.

"What," Ash responded, with more than a little annoyance in his voice.

"Thank you for having me."

"Yeah, whatever. No problem I guess."

"For what it's worth, I don't hate you. You're my cousin, and I love you."

He reached over an hugged the smaller fox. Ash tensed in his embrace, but after a couple of heartbeats he returned it.

"Ok. Sure," said Ash.

"I'm going to bed," said Kristofferson, letting go. Was it just his imagination or did Ash hold on a fraction of a second longer?

"Good night," said Kristofferson, unrolling his sleeping mat and creeping under the train set. His spine already balked at the corkscrew position he had to lay in, but he stayed quiet. Ash turned off the set and climbed the ladder to his bed.

Kristofferson lay looking at the underside of the train set, and wondered how his father was doing. He wanted to call and see how things were doing, but his mother had said she'd call him. He'd only get scolded if he appeared to be worried. His first day of school was tomorrow, and that's all his parents would want him thinking about. A new school, and he was starting late. He supposed the teachers would give him a grace period during which he could get caught up. He wasn't worried though. He was looking forward to immersing himself in work, maybe that would push his troubles to the back of his mind for a while. He could only hope.

Soon, he heard Ash's steady breathing above him. He was already asleep. Poor little guy, thought Kristofferson. Ash was right, his parents were very hard on him, and it couldn't feel good to have them lavish praise on Kristofferson right in front of him. They didn't seem to take Ash's feelings into consideration at all. They love him, that much is obvious, thought Kristofferson, but it seemed like they had a hard time showing it.

What a mess, thought Kristofferson. He hoped his father well got soon.

**~Author's notes~**

**Well, here it is, a day late than I'd intended but editing took up more time than I'd thought it would. Yes, I did embellish the train set a bit. Several times there was a train in the background during this movie, plus there was a touching scene between Ash and Kris involving the train set, so I kind of wanted to highlight the train set as a reference to the use of trains in the background throughout the movie. Hope you enjoy!**


	4. Just Being Friendly

"Magnesium," requested Ash, holding out his hand.

"_Magnesium,"_ he requested again, more forcefully this time.

"Oh, sorry," said Agnes, handing Ash the compound. The lab experiment had only been underway a few minutes and already it was a disaster. Agnes, Ash's lab partner, seemed distracted.

"Pipet," said ash, holding out his paw again.

"Pipet!" he demanded with a snap of his fingers.

"Sorry," said Agnes again, handing over the dropper.

"Potassium Tr-, what are you looking at," asked Ash. "Oh, no," he grumbled. She and Kristofferson were staring at each other, and had been for what appeared to be quite a while.

**=^.^=**

Kristofferson could not take his eyes off of his cousin's lab partner. Agnes, he thought her name was. She kept looking over at him while she helped Ash during the chemistry experiment, and Kristofferson had nothing else to do but return her gaze as he waited on his own lab partner, who was late. No wonder why this guy had no one to be his partner, thought Kristofferson. As the new kid on his first day in class, he'd not had an opportunity to find a lab partner of his own, so the teacher had paired him with Beaver, the only other kid in the class without a partner. Kristofferson was beginning to see why.

Kristofferson jumped as Beaver announced his arrival by dropping his lab equipment on the table with a loud thud.

"Why is your cousin such a wet sandwich," he sneered at Kristofferson without so much as a 'hello'.

"I beg your pardon," replied Kristofferson.

"What's that mean," asked Beaver, obviously perplexed by Kristofferson's perfect English.

"It means I didn't understand what you said," said Kristofferson. "A wet sandwich?"

"Yeah, a wet sandwich," said Beaver in an abrasive and sneering tone. "He's too short, he dresses like a girl, he's…..different."

"Are you a bully," asked Kristofferson, who was already deciding he did not like Beaver very much. "You sound like a bully."

Kristofferson had experience with bullies. Early on in life, he'd been bullied. But then his father had taught him martial arts, and Kristofferson had never had a problem with bullies since. In fact, he often helped out other kids who were smaller and more vulnerable deal with bullies. Kristofferson did not dislike many people, but bullies were one type of person he could not stand.

"Watch this," said Beaver. The larger kid dumped a powder in the beaker containing the experiment, causing an explosion.

"That's…, you just destroyed the whole experiment," said Kristofferson, now mildly annoyed. "We'd better extinguish this magnesium," he said as he went to get the extinguisher.

"Stand back," he said. He aimed the extinguisher at the ruined assignment and put out the flaming magnesium. Though he did not show it on the outside, he was vexed about getting an "F" on his first day. If only the teacher had allowed him to conduct the experiment by himself. Once the magnesium was quelled, he looked over at Agnes, who was looking on in adoration.

"I like your ears," she said, with a hint of shyness in her voice.

"M- mine," stuttered Kristofferson. He was always nervous around girls.

"Mm hmm," affirmed Agnes.

"Well…thanks," said Kristofferson. "I like your spots."

"Really," asked Agnes. "I used to cover them up…but, y'know."

**=^.^=**

Ash scoffed. He'd heard enough. It was bad enough that Kristofferson had had to show off by extinguishing the magnesium, thus playing the hero. It was bad enough that Agnes had paid more attention to him than her own lab partner throughout the entire class. But this trading of awkward compliments was more than he could stand.

"Hmm?" Agnes looked over at him.

"You're supposed to be my lab partner," Ash said.

"I am."

"No you're not," said Ash. "You're disloyal."

Ash wished he could take solace in the fact that his cousin, Kristofferson the Great, would get an 'F' for the failed experiment on his first day, but he couldn't. Kristofferson had already ruined his day by taking away Agnes' attention from him. Today was supposed to be a good day, thought Ash as they left chemistry class. Agnes had volunteered to be his partner. She had _sought him out_ to be partners, yet at the first sight of Kristofferson she'd forgotten Ash existed.

Fine. If that was the way she wanted to be, thought Ash, that was just fine with him. Everyone already hated him, it's not like he'd expected her to be any different. But it would have been nice if she'd just been honest with him. Instead, she had tried to say she was still his partner, even though it was painfully obvious she would have ditched Ash and teamed up with his cousin at the first opportunity. Well, at least now he knew for certain where her loyalty was.

**=^.^=**

Kristofferson had noticed that Ash had not said a single word to him after chemistry class earlier that day. Ash had ignored him when he'd tried to speak with him at lunch, and then had blown him off when he tried to talk to him on their way home, and since they had gotten home Ash had kept his nose buried in the latest White Cape comic, and had eaten supper in his room. Aunt Felicity had talked to her husband about Ash's behavior, and they had both agreed Ash was just going through a phase.

They wanted Kristofferson to speak with him but they didn't understand that Kristofferson was the problem. Kris knew that if he tried to talk to his older cousin it would just make matters worse. Plus, Mr. Fox had left soon after dinner and now it was bedtime and he still wasn't back; Kristofferson had a feeling that Foxie's behavior influenced Ash's bad moods.

Finally Felicity had sent Kristofferson to bed. Kris had been hanging out in the living room trying to avoid Ash, but once Felicity had kindly, but firmly, remarked on the time Kris knew he could delay no longer.

Kristofferson took as long as he could brushing his teeth and getting ready for bed. When he went in Ash's room the tiny fox was up in his bed reading by flashlight. Kristofferson crept to his bedroll under the train set and unfolded it.

"I guess you're happy with yourself, aren't you," said the small fox from his bed.

"I beg your pardon," replied Kristofferson.

"Agnes was my lab partner today, she sought me out to be my partner before you even showed up here. I had one friend at school, and you've taken her from me too."

Kristofferson was dumbfounded.

"I didn't know Agnes was your friend. I just noticed she was looking at me today in class."

"Bullshit Kristofferson. You take everything from me, you always have. The way you show me up all the time, the way my parents fawn over you. You think you're so perfect. Well, maybe you are. But it isn't fair and I just wish you'd go away."

"I was just being friendly Ash. It had nothing to with you. Now, if you don't mind, I'd like to get some sleep."

**=^.^=**

Ash lay awake long after Kristofferson began snoring gently down on the floor. What bothered Ash was not that Agnes had paid attention to Kristofferson. Okay, if he were honest with himself that did bother him, but something else bothered him even more. But he could not quite pinpoint what it was. It was something in the way Kristofferson had looked at Agnes.

Every time Kristofferson had come to visit, he had had nothing but eyes for Ash. The younger fox, though he was bigger and better at everything, had always idolized Ash. When they were younger he'd copied everything Ash had done.

When Kristofferson had ignored Ash and focused on Agnes, Ash had felt strangely jealous. Why would that be? Ash could not figure it out. He didn't want his younger cousin here. If it were up to him Kristofferson would be back across the river tomorrow. But yet, Ash had definitely felt jealous when Kristofferson had spoken to Agnes. Not jealous because Agnes was talking to his cousin, but rather because Kristofferson wasn't paying attention to him.

Ash's last thought that night was that he wanted to be the focus of Kristofferson's attention, not Agnes. He drifted off to sleep before he could figure out why that might be, or to entertain the thought that maybe he wished Kristofferson had looked at _him_ the way he'd looked at Agnes.

**~Author's note:**

**Well, it's starting to take shape. Kristofferson already has enjoyed reflecting on how 'cute' his older cousin is, and now Ash is beginning to realize he wants Kristofferson to only pay attention to him. Their innocent romance is starting to manifest itself ~.^  
**

**Also, I want to give a shout out to my first review and my first follower; many thanks! I am glad you have enjoyed this. I do this purely for the love of it, but it sure makes it easier knowing that there are good folks out there who enjoy reading it Thanks again, and I hope you enjoy this new chapters and the ones that are on their way :)**


	5. A Silent Apology

"Do you mind if I move my bedroll slightly out from under the trainset," asked Kristofferson. "It's kind of hard to sleep in that corkscrew position."

Ash sat up in his bed and glared at Kristofferson. "There's a lot of attitudes going on around here," he replied, right ear fluttering. "Don't let me get one."

"Well, it just my spine—"

"Sleep wherever you want, man. Here, you can have my bed. I'll just….I'll crawl under the bookcase. Who cares if I get splinters in my ears?"

"Never mind."

"What, are you gonna pout about it? Cuz I've had it up _here_ with the sad houseguest routine!"

With that Ash turned off the overhead light and proceeded to read his comic by flashlight, leaving Kristofferson in the dark. The ears twitched on Ash's silhouette, a sure sign that he was not in a reasonable mood. Kristofferson decided to let the matter drop.

"Goodnight," said Kristofferson, dejected.

Kristofferson unrolled his bedroll and crept under the trainset. Burl Ives was singing on the radio.

_"Way down yonder in a wooden trough, An old woman died of the whooping cough, Buckeye Jim…."_

This made Kristofferson think of his father, who may very well be dying at that moment. Tears flooded Kristofferson's eyes. He'd had more than he could take; his father was sick, Ash was so mean to him, his aunt and uncle smothered him with unwanted praise, he missed his school and friends across the river. He simply could not take any more. He began to cry softly. He knew Ash could hear him, but he didn't care anymore.

He heard the smaller fox rustle in his bed, and then footsteps descending on the ladder. Coming to tell me to shut up, thought Kristofferson as he continued to weep. Kristofferson began to feel embarrassed, which only made the tears come harder. He felt truly wretched.

Then Ash did a curious thing; he turned on the train set. Kris was confused enough that he stopped crying and scooted out from under the table. Ash was watching the train, but Kris saw the tiny fox steal a glance at him. Kris could only see Ash's eyes, for the rest of his face was hidden in the darkness, but it told Kris all he needed to know. The small fox's eyes were full of regret, he knew he had hurt Kristofferson. Kris had made no secret about how much he loved the trainset, it was the most beautiful one he'd ever seen; could this be Ash's way of apologizing?

Kris smiled, warmed by the little fox's gesture. He tried to give his cousin a hug, but the smaller fox pulled away at first.

Kris waited a while, then he tried to hug Ash again and this time the little fox allowed him to, though his body was stiff with tension in Kristofferson's arms at first. Then Ash gave in to the embrace and relaxed. It was a quick hug, perhaps five seconds long, but it conveyed a wealth of feeling between the two. When they parted, Ash turned off the train and climbed back into bed.

Though Ash would never actually say he was sorry for hurting his younger cousin, Kristofferson knew he was. Kris wondered why the tiny fox was so reluctant to be held, but he figured Ash was still resentful toward him, and that he probably did not get a lot of hugs, except perhaps from his mother. Ash was fairly insecure, and he might have seen getting hugged by his younger, bigger cousin as demeaning. Whatever the case, decided Kris, Ash had given in and perhaps even enjoyed the contact.

**=^.^=**

Ash lay quietly in bed. He could not sleep; he felt too weirded out. He had gone down and started the train because he felt bad about making his younger cousin cry. It had done the trick, Kristofferson had stopped blubbering like an idiot and looked cheered up, but then the fool had tried to hug him! Ash was creeped out by the first attempt, but then after he had allowed Kristofferson to embrace him, Ash had found it oddly comforting. Actually, not just comforting; it had felt fantastic!

He had not wanted it to end. A whole array of new and strange feelings had hit Ash, similar to the ones he'd had the other day when Kristofferson had been more interested in Agnes than Ash. He could not understand them, and had been so confused by the experience that he did not even return the embrace. Ordinarily, when he was hugged by a person, which wasn't often but when it did happen, it made him feel good and warm inside but tonight was different. When Kristofferson had held him, Ash's body responded in new and weird ways. Ash had wanted the embrace to be tighter, it made him feel great but it also had left him wanting something more, though he did not know what. All he knew was that Kristofferson's embrace had felt wonderful. He had not wanted it to end. As he lay there looking up into the darkness, he wished Kristofferson was next to him right then, at that very moment. He wanted to find out what more there was, that something he'd wanted yet could not name.

He could hear Kris breathing, he sounded so close yet so far away. Ash still hated his cousin in many ways, and wished the damn silver fox would just leave, but on that night he did not feel so alone. Next time, he told himself, he would return his cousin's embrace.

**=^.^=**

Kristofferson too felt very strange as he laid in the darkness. After Ash had turned off the train and gone to bed, Kris curled up on his bedroll beneath the table and tried figure out what he was feeling. He'd never felt anything like it before. When Ash had surrendered to his embrace, a thrill like nothing Kristofferson had ever experienced shot through his body. The only thing close to it was when Pixie, a popular and attractive squirrel back home, had kissed him on the cheek.

Pixie was cute and she was about his age, but what he felt while he'd held Ash was far stronger, it was like a lightning rod hitting him. His entire body felt electrified, especially a certain area that had recently begun to respond to certain things in new ways. Like when Mixie had kissed him, or when he had seen Kiara the famous fox actress remove her clothes in a movie he'd sneaked in to see against his parents' wishes. His body reacted to these things in ways he did not fully understand, yet he knew it was a normal part of growing up. His father had told him the basics of reproduction, the differences between boys and girls and why it was important to take such things slow.

But what was this? Why was his body responding in this way to his smaller cousin who was, after all, a male just like himself?

That was just weird, thought Kristofferson. Boys don't like other boys in that way, he mused, and certainly not cousins. Tomorrow, he decided, he'd ask Agnes out. That was all he needed; to go steady with a girl. Agnes was beautiful, and she seemed very kind. If she accepted Kris' offer, his weird feelings on this night would be quickly forgotten. Or so he hoped…..

**~Author's note~**

**Thanks again for the kind words and for reading along with me. I am going to try very hard to keep this a teen rated story, but keep in mind it may shift to mature, depending on how future chapters come out. While I do not wish to go mature, I will err on the side of caution because I do not want this story to be deleted should I exceed my rating. Should a change in rating happen, I will place a note at the top of the chapter so that more timid readers will be warned. Hopefully, that will not happen and I'll stay within the confines of "Teen"**


	6. A Serious Turn

**Warning: Some potentially offensive words and themes used near the end of this chapter. Please read with caution**

Kristofferson woke to the sound of Ash jumping from his bed and running to the bedroom door. He heard the little fox hurry down the hallway.

"Ash," said Felicity's voice from the kitchen. "You know you are not allowed in the kitchen in such a state! Go and get dressed before you come to the table. Quickly now!"

Kristofferson heard Ash grumble something under his breath as he plodded back to the bedroom. The smell of pancakes wafted in through the open bedroom door. Kristofferson's belly growled at the sweet smelling temptation. He crawled out from beneath the train set and quickly began dressing.

Ash appeared through the doorway, looking sour as ever.

"I didn't know Aunt Felicity made pancakes," said Kristofferson in a lighthearted voice.

"Of course she does," said Ash grumpily. "Doesn't everyone?"

"My father will only eat a healthy breakfast," replied Kris. "It's the most important meal of the day. So we never have them at my house."

Ash grumbled something, all Kristofferson could make was the word "weird". He started to retort, but let it go. He really did not wish to begin the day with an argument.

"Well, I'm looking forward to it," said Kristofferson, referring to the pancakes. "I've only had them three or four times in my life!"

"Whatever," said Ash as the two young boys headed to the kitchen together. Kristofferson trailed slightly behind Ash, and he glanced at Ash's cute posture as he walked. Kristofferson smiled, but then he thought about last night and quickly looked away, focusing on the walls, pictures lining the hallway, and even at one point the ceiling. Anywhere where he could not see his older cousin. Cute indeed! What was he thinking?

He really needed to get these thoughts out of his head, he told himself. He really hoped Agnes would go out with him. He resolved then and there he'd ask her that day, as soon as he could pull her aside he'd pop the question. Sure he was new and they barely knew each other, but he'd felt a connection with her in chemistry class the other day and from the way she'd looked at him, he was fairly certain she felt the connection as well. He wished he had time to buy her a small gift, but he felt a sense of urgency; his thoughts regarding his cousin made him uncomfortable and they seemed to be getting worse. Nonetheless, gift or no gift, he was confident she'd accept his offer.

Kristofferson was so absorbed in his thoughts, he ran right into Ash when the smaller fox abruptly stopped in the middle of the hallway.

**=^.^=**

Just before the two young foxes reached the kitchen, Ash deliberately stopped in his tracks, forcing Kristofferson to bump into him. Kris placed his paws on Ash's shoulders to keep from losing his balance, and his torso bumped into Ash's upper back. For a brief moment, Ash thought he could feel a bulge just below Kristofferson's waist.

The close contact both exhilarated and repulsed the conflicted little fox. On one paw the closeness of Kristofferson's well-built frame sent a wave of excitement through Ash, but on the other paw he was disgusted by his feelings, and hated himself for having them.

He brushed off the contact by bending over and picking up a White Cape action figure that had been left on the floor in the hall, making it look as though that was the reason he stopped.

"Woah there, Ash," exclaimed Kristofferson as he bumped into his cousin. "You okay?"

"I'm fine," replied Ash. "My mom will bitch if she sees this on the floor," he said, referring to the action figure.

"It's ok," said Kristofferson as he pushed his way past Ash and into the kitchen.

"Good morning you two," said Felicity upon seeing them. Two plates, each stacked four high with pancakes, sat waiting for the two boys on the counter. Ash and Kristofferson each took a plate and sat down at the table. Felicity sat a bottle of syrup down on the table between them.

"Where's dad," asked Ash.

"He went out to do some research for his column with Kylie," answered Felicity.

"That old handyman," asked Ash. "What's dad need him for?"

"Your father said he's his new secretary."

"I thought that was you."

"I'm tired Ash, I want to focus on my painting and making sure you and Kristofferson are taken care of each day. Now eat up both of you, you're running late."

**=^.^=**

It wasn't until lunch that Kristofferson finally got to speak with Agnes alone. He approached her table where she was sitting with her friends, and asked her to sit with him at one of the empty tables where they could talk. She accepted, and Kris could hear her friends giggling as they walked away.

"What is it you wanted to talk to me about," Agnes asked once they sat down. Was it just the light or did Kris see her blushing?

"I…uh," Kris began awkwardly. "Well, I was thinking about chemistry class the other day, and I thought that it might be nice if….."

Kris trailed off. He was not very good at this sort of thing. He was a natural at most things he tried, but talking to girls was not one of them.

"Be nice if what," asked Agnes, amusement twinkled in her eyes.

"Well….I'm a fox….and you're a fox….." Kris was struggling. Badly.

Agnes giggled. "I've noticed," she said, grinning.

"Well, I thought maybe you might like to….go out with me?"

"Of course I would, silly," said Agnes.

"I mean….if you don't want to I under-, you will?"

"Of course I will," Agnes repeated. "You're sweet, you're kind and absolutely adorable. How could I say no?"

"I uh…," Kistofferson was blushing fiercely, even the tip of nose was bright red. "Thanks."

"You going to go out for whackbat today," she asked.

"Whackbat," asked Kristofferson. "What's that?"

Agnes looked shocked. "You don't have whackbat across the river," she asked, astonished. "Whatever do you all do for sports?"

"Oh, all kinds of things," said Kristofferson. "I don't do sports much myself, other than swimming and gymnastics. Mostly I do karate to stay in shape."

"Karate," Agnes whispered in amazement. Her eyes were filled with awe. "You know karate?"

"Sure do," said Kris.

"Could you show me some moves?"

"Well, I dunno. It's can be dangerous, it's not to be taken lightly. I guess I could teach you some—"

"Oh, I don't want to learn," said Agnes. "I want you to show me what you can do. Like…can you toss me to the floor," she asked seductively.

Kris dropped his spoon. "I, uh…." He blubbered. His nose was the color of a stop sign. He massaged his neck anxiously as he looked intently at his food, avoiding Agnes' gaze like the plague.

Agnes burst out laughing so loudly several students at other tables turned their heads to stare. "I'm just kidding, goofy," she said once she was able to breathe.

"Oh, okay," said Kristofferson, now thoroughly embarrassed.

"So, are you going to try out at whackbat or not," Agnes asked again. "The team has an opening, I figured since your cousin plays you might have an interest too, but I guess not."

"Do you like it?"

"Me? Oh, I'm not much into the game myself, but I do like boys who play. I like athletes."

"Well, then, I guess I'll try out today. Will you come down and watch; be my moral support?"

"Of course, I wouldn't miss it for the world."

"Then I'll see you down on the pitch."

Kristofferson and Agnes both finished lunch and dumped their trays. Kristofferson escorted her to her next class, which almost made him late for his next one but he didn't care. Agnes was cute and funny, and he liked her. But somehow, as he walked to class alone, all he could think about was Ash sitting by himself, watching him and Agnes forlornly as they talked.

**=^.^=**

Ash was struggling on the field, and to make matters worse Kristofferson had come down to the pitch looking like he was going to try out. Can't that guy give it a rest, Ash wondered. Whackbat is _my_ game, Ash said to himself. Kristofferson had no business being down there as far as the little fox was concerned.

Then, to his horror, Coach Skip called him over.

"C'mon Coach, let me finish this 8th," pleaded Ash.

"No," said Coach Skip. "No, you're done. Step out, let's go."

Ash could not believe what was happening. He was being subbed out for Kristofferson! The only thing tempering his outrage was his anticipation at seeing Kristofferson fail miserably. Whackbat was a very difficult and complex game, there was no way Kristofferson could be good at it without ever having played it before, Ash was sure of it.

"Am I getting better, Coach," asked Ash.

"Well, you're sure as hell not getting any worse," replied Coach Skip.

"Really, you mean…do you think I could end up being as good as my dad if I keep practicing?"

"Your dad? You dad was probably the best whackbat player we ever had at this school," said Coach Skip. "No, you don't want to have to compare yourself to that."

"No," agreed Ash. "But I think I have some of the same raw natural talent, don't you?"

"You're improving," said Coach Skip. "Let's leave it at that."

Ash was about to retort when he saw Kris step up to bat. Ash sneered. Oh, this should be good, he thought. But Kristofferson did not fail. In fact, he hit the pinecone perfectly and scored with ease. I t was one of the best feats Ash had ever seen on the pitch. He was stunned. Coach Skip was reduced to cheering like a fan.

"Whoo, wow," said the coach. "That's the first time this kid's ever swung a whackbat? He really is your father's nephew, isn't he?"

"Not by blood," said Ash.

"No?"

"He's from my mother's side," said Ash as he spit on the ground in disgust. He was too shocked to be angry just yet, but he knew that would come. Here, yet again, his damned cousin had bested him in something. The damn kid was just good at everything he tried. A natural, thought Ash. He felt his ears twitching. He couldn't help it. He felt so small at that moment, so insignificant. Coach Skip had basically just gotten through telling him he stunk and there was no chance of him getting better, and then Kristofferson goes out and puts in one the best performances in recent memory the first time he'd ever picked up a whackbat. It wasn't fair!

Then Ash spotted Agnes. What was this? She never came down to the pitch. She was holding a sign but Ash couldn't make it out. He stormed over to her, hoping she'd be able to tell him something to soften the blow. Agnes was nothing if not a good friend, and she always had the right thing to say to make Ash feel better.

"What's that stand for," he asked when he got over to her. He now saw the sign had the letter 'K' on it.

"It's for pep," she replied. She looked sideways at the ground. She was obviously uncomfortable. Ash just stared.

Finally Agnes looked up. "We're going steady," she said.

Ash just simply rolled his eyes and walked away. Of course, he shouldn't even have had to ask. Of course his best friend was going out with Kristofferson. That just par the course, Ash fumed. Everything he did, Kristofferson had to do better. Everything he had, Kristofferson had to either take away or top, often both.

Whatever, thought Ash. He didn't even finish watching the game. He simply went into the locker room, took a long hot shower, and left early for his next class.

As he left the pitch he passed a few students who had gathered to near the back entrance to the school. "Hey weirdo, how does it feel to get your ass handed to you by your little cousin," one of them shouted. It was young white rabbit who was in the same year as Ash, his long ears twitching excitedly as he taunted the tiny fox. Another kid, a stoat who was a year ahead of Ash, sneered at him through wire-rimmed glasses.

"Why don't you just give it up, ya little faggot," the rodent said. "You suck anyway, now your cousin kicks your ass on his first day."

They all laughed. Ash's ears twitched and he spit.

"What's the matter," taunted the rabbit. "You gonna cry for us? Why are you so pathetic? How in the hell are you and Kristofferson related?"

"I bet their not even related," said a young female chipmunk. "Kristofferson is soooo dreamy, there's no way him and this little runt are from the same family. I bet Kristofferson is just saying they are because he feels sorry for this little queer. Trying to do him a favor by pretending they're related."

"Yeah," said the stoat. "Why don't you do _us_ all a favor and go kill yourself, ya runty little faggot? I'm sure your 'cousin' would be grateful not to have you dangling at his backside, holding him down!"

All of the kids laughed and voiced their agreement with this assessment.

"Kristofferson is nothing," shouted Ash. He was shocked to hear these words come out of his mouth. But he was so upset he could not stop himself. The words tumbled forth unbidden. "He's trash, all of his family on the other side of the river is. That's why his father is sick, because they're unclean. They don't bathe or groom. Kristofferson has beagle ticks, and pelt lice. Why do you think I took a shower and left the pitch early? I don't want him infesting me! We make him sleep in the attic without a blanket or anything, because we don't want him spreading his germs around the house or onto our things."

The kids were speechless. Ash probably could have said more; _would_ have said more, but the final period bell rang and the students dispersed.

Ash stayed outside. He could not move, he simply stood there trembling. How could he have said such awful things about his cousin? Sure, he wished Kristofferson would leave, and he was angry at him for stealing Agnes and making him look bad at whackbat, but Kris did not deserve such horrible things to be said about him.

Ash looked over and saw Kris headed his way with Agnes. Kris was laughing and looked so happy. He had no idea the vile things Ash had just said about him. Ash ran inside before Kris saw him, and he went into the first room he could find, which was an empty classroom. Ash shut the door and watched Kris and Agnes walk by, unaware of him watching them.

He looks so happy, thought Ash. Ash noted Kristofferson's beautiful coat, how could he have said he had lice? Ash began to cry. His cousin was beautiful, and he knew that deep down Kristofferson cared about him, even looked up to him to some degree. And Ash had repaid him by saying such horrid things. The tiny fox watched his cousin walk on, oblivious to vile rumors that were being spread about him right then. Rumors started by his own cousin.

"Kris, I'm sorry," whispered Ash, but the empty room offered nothing but silent condemnation in return he quietly wept.

**Author's note:**

**Poor Ash, now we get a deeper insight into why he's so grumpy and insecure. He takes his pain out on others, which in turn makes him feel even worse. But Kris will help him with that :-)  
**


	7. Kristofferson Shares His Burdens

The days after Kristofferson had joined the whackbat team and hooked up with Agnes had been among the best and worst of his life. On one paw, the team had won three games in a row with him playing, and he was rapidly becoming one of the more popular kids in school. He and Agnes were taking things slow and steady, but she'd turned out to be a good confidant for Kris.

But with his newfound popularity came nasty rumors, and Ash had barely spoken to him since that day nearly a week ago. The small fox refused to look at him, and spent most of his time alone in his room. A couple of times Kristofferson had thought he heard the small fox crying, but each time he tried to see what was wrong Ash had simply walked away without a word. The rumors bothered Kris more than he cared to admit, but they paled in comparison to his concern over his cousin. Something was bothering Ash, and no matter how many times Kristofferson tried to tell himself it wasn't his problem, he could not ignore it. Especially since he was probably to blame for Ash's melancholy state.

"What's wrong," asked Agnes.

Kristofferson and Agnes walked along the banks of the river near her house. Kristofferson was quiet a while before answering.

"A lot of things, Agnes," said Kris.

"I could tell," she replied. "You've been so quiet tonight."

"Well, I'm worried about Ash. He barely speaks anymore, he just sits in his room alone all day. He's hateful to anyone who tries to talk to him."

"That's just normal Ash," said Agnes, placing a comforting paw on Kris' shoulder. "He hardly ever says two words to anyone. He's….different. You know that."

"I know, but something has changed ever since I joined the team. He quit, you know?"

"Quit whackbat?! Are you sure?"

The two foxes stopped walking. Agnes now had a bit of worry in her eyes as well.

"Yes, Coach Skip told the team before our last game."

"But whackbat is Ash's life. Well, that and comic books. What would make him quit?"

"Me. I played a perfect 8th the first time I ever played, and Coach Skip benched Ash for me. I don't think he could stand the humiliation. I wish I'd never tried out."

"But you can't blame yourself for that. You have a right to play sports too. It isn't your fault Ash is too immature to handle someone being better than him."

"You know, I told myself the same thing, but it doesn't make me feel any better. Fact is, Ash lost one of the few things that made him happy because of me. I feel wretched for it."

"What do his parents say?"

"Well, they finally noticed something was wrong yesterday. As usual it took them forever. Now they want me to speak to him. I can't seem to get them to understand that _I'm_ the problem."

Agnes put her arms around Kristofferson's neck. Kris returned her embrace. The sun was beginning to set, the crimson and amber hues made the river appear to be on fire.

"I just hope my father gets well soon. It will be best for everyone once I can leave," said Kris.

"Don't say that, Kris," replied Agnes. "You make everyone's lives better when you're around. One day, Ash will see that too."

"That's not the only thing bothering me," said Kris.

"What else is there?"

"I'm not sure I should say."

"You know you can trust me."

"I know…..it's something Foxie wants me to do tonight. I have to meet him outside after dark. I think it has something to do with the farmers."

"Bogis, Bunce and Bean?!"

"Yeah, I think so."

"Oh Kris, no! That's too dangerous! Tell your uncle you can't do it!"

"I can't do that Agnes. For one thing, I gave my word. For another….I don't think Uncle Foxie would take no for an answer."

"You have to tell someone!"

"No! Agnes, please, understand I can't back out and no one can know. If I told anyone, it would make more trouble than if I just go."

"But if you're caught you'll die."

"Hopefully, we won't get caught. Uncle Foxie used to be a professional after all. He's really good at it."

"But he was caught once before!"

"I know. Well, hopefully he learned from his mistakes. Anyway, it's getting late, I better head home."

"Kris…."

"Agnes, please, I gotta go. Remember, don't tell anyone."

"I won't, but please try to get out of it. Your uncle has no business dragging you into such a mess."

Kristofferson gave Agnes a peck on the cheek and left for home. She had a point, but what was Kris to do? He'd given his word, and he was not a fox that would go back on a promise. Plus, he'd do anything to get out of the house and away from Ash for a while.

"You're up to something with my father," said Ash. "What is it?"

The family had just finished dinner, Kris had headed to Ash's room to get ready to meet his uncle outside, who had already left to meet Kylie.

"I uh…," Kris started. "What do you mean?"

"I know my father has been leaving at night, and I saw him talking to you yesterday. What are you planning?"

Kris sighed. It was not in him to deceive people, and this was the first time his cousin had spoken to him in days. Kris blamed himself for Ash's recent depression, so he came clean.

"He wants me to help steal some cider from Bean," said Kris. "I really don't know the details or the entire plan, but it had something to do with sneaking into the cellar under the farmer's house."

Ash's eyes lit up.

"Wait," said Kris. "You can't tell anyone. I have to get dressed to go, but you have to stay here. And pretend I never said a word."  
Ash nodded in agreement.

**=^.^=**

While Kristofferson was getting ready, Ash snuck out of the house to meet his father. Ahead he found them, talking over the plan.

"….where he lives," Ash heard Kylie say.

"Where he keeps the cider," said Mr. Fox.

"Below where he lives," said Ash, now having caught up with them.

"Wha-? Where did you come from," said Mr. Fox. "Go back to the tree and do your homework!"

"I want to help you steal some cider," said Ash.

"We're going to a book party," said Mr. Fox. "And keep your mouth about any cider because no one ever said that. Now get out of here!"

"But…" Ash could tell he was losing this fight.

"But nothing," said Mr. Fox. "You're gonna get me in a lot of trouble. Besides, you're too little and uncoordinated."

This hit Ash in the pit of his stomach. For a moment he was hurt, he nearly felt like he was going to cry. But the hurt turned to anger within seconds, and he just stared back at his father and spit.

"One, two, three!" shouted Mr. Fox, pointing back at the tree.

Ash growled in frustration and left. Hot tears burned his eyes as he headed back to the house. He passed Kristofferson on the way. Kris looked like he was about to say something but Ash shot him a dark look. Whatever Kris was going to say died on his lips. Ash went back inside. He was nearly hysterical, he could not decide whether to cry or start breaking things. That his mom was asleep meant he must be quiet, so he put a pillow over his muzzle and screamed into it. He screamed until his throat was raw and sore, and then the screams turned into sobs.

His father hated him, and had literally just told him he was too little and uncoordinated to be of any worth. Not only that, but apparently Kristofferson was good enough. Why didn't his father just adopt Kristofferson. Maybe he would. Maybe Kristofferson's dad would die and Kris would live here full time. Then Ash would probably have to move out of his room. After all, Kris meant more to Ash's parents than their own son.

All of these thoughts and more, some of them very dark, went through Ash's mind. The little fox curled into a ball on his bed, his tiny form made to look smaller than ever, like a child half his age, as he cried softly to himself alone in the darkness of his room.

**~Author's note~**

**Poor little Ash, shunned by his parents and oblivious to Kris' feelings, while neither cousin is exactly sure what they feel for each other. So many questions and doubts, it's starting to eat away at both of them. But don't despair, the night is darkest before dawn :) **


	8. Like Liquid Gold

Kristofferson did not like this situation at all. He did not approve of such clandestine operations, and what was more Ash appeared to be very hurt by what was going on. Kris had not liked the look on Ash's face when he'd passed him, he wished he could go back and talk to the little fox instead of what he was about to do.

Mr. Fox appeared to care more about thieving and deceiving his wife than the toll his actions were taking on his son. What was more, Kris thought this all seemed very dangerous, and for little reward. After all, it was not like Mr. Fox couldn't afford to buy food for his family. This all seemed to be for Mr. Fox's need to feel young again, for some sort of thrill, and he was putting his family in danger to do it.

Kris was determined that this would be the only time he'd go along with something like this. It was risky and dishonest, two things that went against his nature.

"Ahh, good, you made it," said Mr. Fox once Kris had caught up with them. "Here, put this bandit hat on. Anybody see you?"

"I don't think so," Kris lied. He hated lying, but it was to protect Ash. The last thing he wanted was for Mr. Fox to yell at Ash some more.

"I must say I'm pleased to be invited," said Kris as he slipped the bandit hat on. "But I'm not sure I should be doing this."

"Why not," asked Mr. Fox.

"Because I don't like being dishonest with people."

"Well, just keep your mouth shut and it won't be a problem."

Nice rationalization, thought Kristofferson. Apparently Mr. Fox had never heard of lying by omission, Kris brooded. The more this went on, the less Kris was pleased by it.

Mr. Fox pried away the bars on the cellar and the trio made their way inside. Kris had never seen so much cider before.

"This is the finest alcoholic cider known to man," said Mr. Fox. "They say it tastes like liquid gold."

Kristofferson was repulsed by it. Who needed to drink so much alcohol, he wondered. Kris could not understand how a soul could be so broken it needed to drown itself with inebriation. But then he thought of Ash, who seemed to be getting worse every day. Dear God, I hope Ash never turns to something like this, thought Kris. If he does, the soul blame rests on his father, thought Kristofferson angrily. And perhaps me as well, Kris added reluctantly.

Kris' thoughts were interrupted by the sound of someone snapping their fingers. It was a rat, who was apparently a security guard for Bean. The rat and Mr. Fox struggled for a while, Kris was ready to jump in at any moment Mr. Fox needed help, but then the cellar door opened and both the rat and Mr. Fox looked up. Kris took the opportunity and grabbed the rug out from under the rat, who lost his balance and fell into a trap door. The door fell closed on him as Kris and Mr. Fox ran for cover.

A woman came down and took to bottles of cider, one of which was very close to Mr. Fox, who had taken refuge on one of the shelves, yet she never saw him. She took the bottles and uneventfully went back up stairs.

"Oh my God," said Kylie. "Is she blind?"

"I think she might have a stigmatism," said Kristofferson. "Or possibly a cataract of some form. Anyway, her eyes don't see well."

The trio stole one bottle of cider each and headed back home. Mr. Fox bragged along the way about what a natural Kristofferson was. Kris resented this praise even more than usual. I'm not natural thief, he thought. How dare Mr. Fox have me steal from someone and then brag about it? This is the last time I do something like this.

=^.^=

Ash feigned sleep when he heard Kristofferson return home. Kris whispered Ash's name, but Ash remained silent and kept his breathing steady, exhaling slightly through his mouth to further the illusion. Kris lingered a moment, but soon Ash heard the younger fox slip into his pajamas and crawl under the train set. Ash was thoroughly miserable. Deep down he'd hoped Kris would have persisted until he answered him, he wanted to talk. He wanted to get stuff off his chest. Most of all, he wanted Kristofferson to hug him like the night he'd turned on the train set as an apology for making Kris cry. That night had been magic, and Ash regretted not returning Kristofferson's embrace. He wanted that embrace to last longer. Yet he was angry at Kris; and wanted him to go away. Ash tossed and turned all night, his conflicted feelings made sleep nearly impossible.

But eventually he found himself drifting off, with Kristofferson's gentle snores providing an oddly comforting lullaby. Perhaps...he didn't want Kris to leave at all.

**Okay, so I'm going out of town for the holidays so this is probably the last update until after New Year's. Target date for the new chapter is Jan. 3rd or 4th. Thanks for reading and I hope you have safe and happy holidays :)**

**EDIT: I had to change the ending of this chapter, I jumped the gun a bit on the next part. There is another scene to go before that part happens. Sorry for any confusion, I'm still new at this lol :P**


	9. The Shooting

"Ash, about last night," Kris said the next morning. It was a Saturday, Agnes was visiting Family all weekend and Kris was not going to spend the entire time avoiding Ash. They had to talk.

Ash said nothing.

"Ash, I know you don't want me here, but I have no choice."

Ash glanced up from his comic book, but still said nothing.

"I didn't ask for any of it. I don't ask for your father's praise, I didn't ask for Agnes to talk to me all through Chemistry, I didn't ask to become a star at whackbat and I sure as hell didn't want to go rob someone last night. I wish he'd taken you instead of me."

"I don't care about a bunch of cider."

"Yes, you do. I saw how upset you were, and I get it. You don't care so much about what you're doing as long as it's with your dad. I feel the same way about my dad, and if someone came along like me and took my dad's praise, I'd be upset too. I try to avoid your dad but he seeks me out. I wish my dad would get better and could go home, so maybe your dad would pay more attention to you. Ash, you may hate me all you want, but I love you and...I haven't been trying to take anything from you. I want you to be happy."

With me. That's what I'd really like, thought Kristofferson. _I'd like us to enjoy life together..._

"I don't hate you, Kris," Ash said in a small voice. "I'm just tired of everyone hating me. I'm tired of being…different. It sucks."

"Well, I don't hate you Ash," Kris said, feeling a bit better after what Ash had just said. "I've always loved you, from the earliest days I can remember when I used to chase you around the mulberries. I've always thought of you as my best friend, even though we only see each other a few times a year. I didn't want to leave my father, but sleeping in the same house with you has always been a dream of mine."

_Did I say too much?  
_

Kris sat down next to Ash on his bed, so close that their thighs touched, and put a gentle paw on Ash's shoulder. "And don't worry about being…..different. I like 'different', it makes you cool."

"Cool? Me?"

"You're the only person in the room besides me, who do you think I was talking to? Of course you're cute—er, I mean cool."

Crap! How could he slip up like that, thought Kristofferson. Idiot! Thankfully, Ash didn't seem to notice. Ash just looked at him. Suddenly, Ash embraced Kris and held him tight.

"Woah," said Kris in surprise, but then he returned the embrace. The two you foxes held each other a long time, a few silent tears running down each of their cheeks.

**=^.^=**

Ash wanted to tell Kris about the rumors. He felt so guilty, and he knew that Kris was bothered by them. But he stayed quiet, he didn't want this moment to end. It was so hard for him to accept and receive affection, so moments like this were rare. He felt a coward for keeping quiet, but so be it. He was not going to ruin this.

Suddenly the door opened. "Hey kids," said Felicity. "Aww," she said when she saw the two foxes hugging. They let go and turned to her.

"Sorry," she said. "Would either of you like to go to the supermarket? I'm about to head out the door."

As soon as she asked, gunshots rang out outside. "Oh my, what is that," said Felicity. "You two stay here and don't come out until I say so," she said as she shut the bedroom door and ran downstairs.

Once all had settled and the two cousins were allowed to come of Ash's room, the family and Kylie all sat down in the living room as Felicity sewed a patch over the tailhole in one of Mr. Fox's pairs of pants.

"It'll grow back won't it" asked Ash.

"Tails don't grow back," said Foxie." I'm going to be tailless for the rest of my life."

"Well, it could be worse," said Ash. "I mean, it's not as bad as double pneumonia, right? I mean, his dad has one foot in the grave and three feet on a banana peel." The small fox gestured toward Kris, who was in the kitchen finishing off his tea.

"Ash!" Felicity was appalled.

Kristofferson threw an acorn to the floor in the kitchen. It bounced off all four walls and landed perfectly in his cup. He glared at Ash. "Excuse me everyone," Kris said. "I'm going to meditate for half an hour." He left and, uncharacteristic of Kristofferson, he slammed the door behind him.

Ash knew the moment he'd said what he'd said that he'd gone too far. Why did he do that?!

"You have twenty-nine minutes to come up with a proper apology," said Felicity in a dangerous voice.

The floodgates burst for Ash. The words came forth unbidden. "Me have an apology? He gets a bandit hat, he just got here and gets a bandit? Where's my bandit hat? Why didn't I get shot at? It's because you….you….you think I'm no good at anything! Well, maybe you're right, thanks," he yelled as he stormed off and slammed the door shut behind him.

How dare they force him to apologize, Ash said to himself as he stormed up the stairs to his room. But he did feel bad about what he'd said. Sometimes words just come out before he can stop them. He hoped Kris was in his room, but when he got up there Kris was nowhere to be see. Must be meditating out on the deck, thought Ash.

(Three hours later...)

By the time Kris came up for bed, Ash was no longer angry. In fact, he felt terrible about what he'd said.

"Kristofferson I'm—"

"You know what," interrupted Kristofferson. "Save it Ash. I'm tired."

"But I—"

"No you're not," Kris interrupted again. "My aunt is making you say whatever it is you're about to say, and I don't want to hear it. Maybe when you mean it, I'll listen."

Ash wanted to say more, but he felt crushed. He was really sorry, but Kris was right to suspect it wasn't genuine. After all, his mom _had_ demanded that he apologize. Most of Ash's apologies were half sincere at best, but most people accepted them. Here, however, he was legitimately sorry yet it was not accepted. This was a new feeling and it was devastating to the tiny fox.

"Kris I—"

It wasn't Kristofferson that interrupted Ash this time, it was a deep rumble followed by a loud crash that shook the tree.

Ash could hear his father yelling in the next room. "Wake up everyone," he screamed. "They're digging us out!"

"Who," Ash asked his cousin.

"Humans," said Kris. All of the frustration was gone from Kris' voice and eyes, he looked and sounded scared. He moved closer to Ash, protectively, and Ash was comforted. "Humans have come, and they're here to kill us."

**Hey there, hope you all had a safe and fun holiday season! Here is the first installment of 2014, and I tried a few new little tricks and techniques of narration. Hope you like it :)**


	10. Dig!

The noises coming from outside the tree were deafening to the small animals inside. Ash's parents were becoming frantic, and though they tried to hide their worry from the kids, their fear was obvious. Ash didn't know much about humans, only that stealing from them would get you killed. Ash, Kylie and Kristofferson stood out in the hallway as Mr. and Mrs. Fox tried to think about what to do, as chunks of the wall shook loose and scattered on the floor. The ceiling cracked and began to cave in. Ash grabbed his cousin's paw and held it. Kris looked at him, and Ash could tell the younger fox was afraid as well.

"I've got it," said Mr. Fox suddenly. "Why didn't I think of this sooner?" He looked at his wife. "We've been trapped before," he continued. "Everyone, dig!"

And so they dug. They dug endlessly and tirelessly, leaving behind the great tree house Mr. Fox had been so happy to buy for his family. They dug relentlessly for over an hour until finally the humans could no longer be heard, and they stopped to rest a while.

"I think it's time for me to give us a pep talk and explain some things," said Mr. Fox. "A very long time ago-"

"Excuse me," interrupted Felicity. "May I have a word with you. Privately?"

"Well..." said Mr. Fox. "We're in a hole..."

"Just on the other side of this mineral deposit," said Felicity. "Follow me."

Her tone invited no negotiation. Mr. Fox followed.

"What do you think they're going to talk about," Ash asked Kristofferson.

"I don't know," said Kris. "But I think your mom is very upset about Uncle Foxie stealing from those farmers. The other night when I got home she confronted him while I still had my bandit mask on. She seemed very upset. I don't think Uncle Foxie was supposed to steal from humans ever again. I think he promised Aunt Felicity he wouldn't. "

"But why would my dad go back on his word?"

"I don't know. I think foxes from your side of the family take to many risks. Besides, I don't think he cares about the promises he makes."

"From my side of the family? What's that supposed to mean?"

"Never mind, Ash, I don't want to fight. I'm tired."

Just then Ash's parents came back. Mr. Fox was sporting a scratch on his face. _Wow, Mom really lost her temper. _

"Alright everyone," said Mr. Fox. "Let's all go to sleep. Kylie, you take that rock over there, Ash and Kristofferson, take those two little ones right there, Ash you take whichever one is the smallest. Your mom and I are going to take this ledge right here."

"You mean I'll be taking it," said Felicity in a cold voice.

"Right, yeah, that's what I meant," said Mr. Fox. "You take the ledge and I'll..., I'll just sleep on the ground right here. Yep, sounds good to me."

(A few hours later)

A great rumble woke the animals from sleep yet again. This time, it was louder than anything they had ever heard; great steel shovels with motors and treads were tearing up the earth. The foxes and Kylie began to dig again.

"Ash," said Mr. Fox as he dug alongside Ash. "Are you angry with me? I understand if you are and I never would have involved your cousin if I'd known you'd feel this way. It's only because he's a natural. I mean, look at him dig!"

Indeed Kristofferson was well ahead of the others, digging his way at a pace none could hope to match.

"Anyway, I'm sorry if-"

"You know what," Ash said, interrupting his father. "I'm just gonna put dirt in my ears...ah, that's better. I can't hear you now, but keep talking."

Ash didn't want to hear it. His father didn't care how he felt, it was only now that things had backfired that he was pretending to be sorry for anything. If those humans had not showed up with their shovels, guns and terrible tractors Ash's dad would still be sneaking out to steal from them, oblivious and unapologetic about any consequences or negative impact it may have on his family.

=^.^=

Much later, after the family was no longer in immediate danger, Kristofferson meditated while Ash sat nearby with a comic book.

"I don't have beagle ticks, by the way," said Kristofferson.

"What? Me neither! Er...uh... who said we have beagle ticks..or...whatever..." said Ash.

"Apparently that's what you've been telling everyone, that I have beagle ticks and pelt lice."

"I never said that. And you're misquoting me. Or someone is. But I'm going to get to the bottom of it."

"Look Ash we may or may not ever see the light of day again but I really like Agnes and I think she likes me."

"Uh-huh, well she's a free agent so what do I care?"

"Then why are you dead set on-"

"Can I ask you a question," interrupted Ash.

"You may."

"What is the point of sitting on the floor with your legs twisted into a pretzel and talking to yourself for an hour and a half? It's weird."

"My father and I first began meditating when-"

"Well, ok," Ash interrupted again. "But I'd worry more about what that does for my reputation than whether or not you have beagle ticks or not."

"I don't," said Kris. "Nor pelt lice."

=^.^=

Hours later, Ash was still upset about the conversation he'd had with his cousin. That Kristofferson knew he'd spread the rumors about Kris having ticks and lice didn't bother him as much as he'd have thought it would. It was the other stuff Kristofferson had said. About Agnes. It was clear that Kristofferson would prefer to spend time with her, rather than with him. Which hurt the little fox; Ash realized he may not show it on the outside, but inside he craved Kristofferson's attention.

Especially after the things Kris had said to him the other day. He knew Kris loved him, or at least Kris _had _loved him before the rumors and before their argument, but now there was such a divide between them Ash did not know if he'd ever have his cousin's full and undivided love.

_If only I hadn't said that about his dad. With the way my father feels about me, I forget that others may dearly love their dads. _

He wasn't sure why he wanted Kristofferson's attention, nor did he know why he wanted to get Kris alone or what they'd do by themselves; all Ash knew was that whatever kind of attention Kris gave Agnes, he'd rather Kris give it to him instead.


End file.
